Sunday, 17 October 2010

A whole lotta trouble...

Oh Dear oh dear, I'm in trouble - the Panty Mantis has got wind of Pleasure Ureself: A Practical Guide to being Fat and Jellus and she's not happy....

This is what I received:

Oye Lusinder,
Eye've beene tryinge to reade the stayte of Orlandoe nowe four a fewe dayes (thoughe eye ended uppe havinge to gette Orlandoe to helpe mee,) and eye'm notte happie. yew shuld be woreeied thayt yew are alle fate and jellus, notte celebratinge the facte....

Eye'll telle yew alle this fur nothinge: Orlandoe doesnte lyke fatties ande anyewaye, eye have himme alle to myselfe alreadie. Yew are all farre to fatte to aprec.... umme aprrecia,..... (Oye Orlandoe, eye wante to saye lyke but usinge bigge words - canne yew help?........oye, there is no neede to bee rude orlandoe...) where was eye? a..p....r...e....c....i....a....t.....e mye wisdome......

(thayte waz harde worke)

Yure newe range woynt helpe yew either - and yure booke........ its gotte far too manye words in itte alreadie, myene is muche better - eye onlee have three in the whole thinge!

givvee uppe, eye havve wun, change yure ways.....

Its a bit confused ( i guess she must get like that when she's angry) Poor orlando - she sounds pissed.... i hope he's ok....


  1. Perhaps,there is only a character of "Fate and Jellus" in M's dictionary.

  2. I would of thought its more likely to be "me. me. me"

    or words to that effect... :D

  3. I'll bet the Mantis is secretly fatandjellus that Pleasure Ureself is going to sell more copies than her comic book and that Pleasure Ureself has more words in it. She's just full of piss and wind - maybe that accounts for the varying sizes of the belly??

  4. do you know, ive been thinking that - its the only explanation for the more unhinged outbursts..

    Donte worrie Pantie mantiz - eye donte thinke wee wille bee competinge four the sayme markets