Sunday, 17 October 2010
Part 4: Designing your favourite room of the house
It seems a small point but having the correct environment in which to practice is a crucial part of being Fat and Jellus. In most cases this means the Kitchen. That hallowed environment that is key to any aspiring fat and jellus person.
Make I make the following suggestions?
A bright and airy kitchen will do you no favours, all though no doubt you are fat (or aspiring to be fat) and proud but do you want the world to know the secret of your success? Far better, surely, to have your neighbours mavel and your amazing weight gain! Instead make your Kitchen dark and cosy - you can stuff your face in private and keep your fatty secrets to yourself!
The Fridge is also key to a properly equipped kitchen - unfortunately most fridges are not large enough to hold enough food for the truly committed - I'd suggest you identify an entire wall for this purpose, if you share your living space, make sure that you have locked doors - you dont want to be coming down, in the zone, to found someone has eaten your entire supply of lard. Also beware of the brightness of fridge lights - it can be most disconcerting and is a health and safety risk - In your new dark and cosy kitchen, never approach the fridge from your couch without your sunglasses on.
The last point i'd like to make: ensure that your doors are wide enough, you don't want to reach the crucial goal to find you cant get out of the door - there is no point in achieving the fat and then not being able to share the jellusy!