Saturday, 9 July 2011

Red hot Panty Mantis

What a treat! The Panty Mantis has decided to share with us the details of her so private and perfect lyfe, I was truly excited when i got shown the link by one of the fat n jellus girls from Delphi :)

Whilst Im sure there is absolutely no connection, its lovely to see that the questions on the minds of the interviewers at Perth Now! seem to be troubled by exactly the same issues that have been haunting us fat n jellus ones, making us cry into our lard pots and sink lower into our oversized chairs.. shall we take a look at a few highlights?:

"After a few more shots, she takes the opportunity to feed Flynn again, while also feeding herself a plate of salmon and spinach, and a side of fries. "I need the carbs," she says."

excellent, I dont know about you but extremely glad to see that although she may yet again resemble a walking stick insect, she hasnt totally lost her fat n jellus leanings! keep up with that Panty Mantis and one fine day we may be able to welcome you back to the fold.

"When I was pregnant, I thought, 'It doesn't matter if I get a stretch mark or if my body doesn't come back'," she says. "During the birth process, I gave everything over to him, and let go of any attachment I had to myself. I wanted him to be healthy and it didn't matter what happened to me. "

Well if I was a cynical fat n jellus cow my eyebrow would be raising rather high at this one, but obviously, having experienced the true freedom that comes with being fat n jellus, the ability to eat as much lard as you like etc - I am sure shes being absolutely truthful - after all, whats not to like about being fat, puffy and jellus.

""If you're comfortable in your own skin, you allow others to be comfortable in theirs. Don't compare yourself to someone else. "

ahhhh sorry panty mantis, its just that you're lyfe is so perfect and you have orlando all to ureself, its hard not to draw some comparisons

now, bring on the royal polo match - nothing will make my day more than seeing classy and arsy in the same shot!

(yes yes, I know - no lyfe of my own, fat n jellus etc etc etc)


  1. Whilst I really would love to see Slutty McSlutson standing next to the Duchess of Cambridge and smiling like the oxygen deprived loon that she is, I reeeeeeally hope she doesn't make it back to LA in time for any of the functions organised for the Royal Visit.

  2. joders, it seems your wish has been granted - instead the PM is running around NYC in a see thru vest! That was a close shave for Princess Kate!