Boobology

Image: Orlando Bloom tries hard to maintain his dignity in the face of open ridicule

How exciting, the Mantis' boobies are now not only out in pictures so large the the diameter resembles a small roundabout, but they are also in 3D. Vogue have kindly put a enormous exhibition devoted to 3D photographs of her with her baps out - nice eh!

It seems that you too can have the experience of being up close and personal to the mantis' puppies.. What a proud day for Orlando - I wonder if he gets a proportion of the entrance fee for each guest, seeing as how its his "wifes" boobies up there on display in the name of art....

I understand why Orlando looks the way he does in this photo, but I am a little confused about why the Panty Mantis is looking excited - surely she's looked at them in a mirror before, or is because the little one, in her belly has started kicking her hard at the thought of lunches to come....

p.s: Yo! Anomers -Just in case you've forgotten I know I'm Fat, Jellus and want Orlando all to Myself AND cant appreciate stunningness when I see it - please don't feel the need to point it out - you must get bored of typing the same thing and I'm certainly getting bored of deleting it.....

Milan Calling

Poor old OB and his Pregnant Panty Mantis, were caught out twice yesterday evening, first by the rain and then by those pesky paparazzi as they went out for a romantic dinner together with 20 of their closest photographers...


"OY yew evul Cowz, yew telle mee eye'm not stunninge and gawguss ande eye'll gette yew"

Later that evening, Orlando finally took her to that which she desires most; a public event with photographers, she actually has my sympathy - its been a while since he last let her out! I haven't posted the pictures here - one of the mantis is more than enough on for a person to be looking at on a sunday morning, but she is certainly very small for someone who is 6 months pregnant and a braver person than most people I know, doing an evening in stilettos whilst in her condition...

If it wasn't for the Hobbit Hair I'd say Orlando was looking good here (i'm not a fan of that hairdo but he's doing a role so I'll let him off). Nice coat and nice grey cardi / white shirt combo - plus he looks like he's had his annual bath!

I wonder what that woman with the microphone is asking him...... the guy behind him looks a bit surprised!

Can anyone identify this Mantis?

Ok so I kind of gave it away in the title, obviously I do realise its our Panty mantis but holy photoshop batman - she's hardly recognisable...

Obviously in any photo of her that, to me anyway, is a good thing. (i know fat/jellus/orlando for myself) I can also understand the need for Vogue to get their computer tools out before putting "A vision of femininity" next to a photo of our mantis!

(P.s Sorry that i had to put this picture up with this post, it just wouldnt of made sense without it.... but I made it smaller to compensate!)